Hereās something you mightnāt be used to hearing:Ā stop seeking your purpose.
I know; pretty counter-cultural. I certainly wasnāt expecting to hear this from one of the most prominent visionaries of our time, Kute Blackson. Kute recently came onto the podcast and unpacked a whole bunch of perspectives that have helped me see life from a very different angle.
And yes, Kute told me that I should stop seeking my purpose if I truly want to find my place in life. But it isnāt as black and white as it sounds ā so today, I thought Iād explore this topic with you a little further.
Kuteās bold statement prompted me to explore a whole bunch of different perspectives on finding your purpose. I think itās an incredibly important topic for entrepreneurs, since weāre often driven by a desire to make a difference and create something meaningful.
Letās take a look at different perspectives on a very popular question: how do you find your purpose?
Why Humans Want to Find Their Purpose
āIndeed, a sense of purpose appears to have evolved in humans so that we can accomplish big things together ā which may be why itās associated with better physical and mental health.ā
Thatās a quote pulled from this article by theĀ Greater Good Science Center. I wanted to start at ground level and figure out why weāre so intensely driven to find our purpose ā and according to the author, it stems from our evolutionary need to progress.
Iād add to this and say that finding a purpose gives you a sense of meaning, which is something we humans uniquely enjoy (Iād recommend reading āSapiensā by Yuval Noah Harari for more info on that).
Here are a few interesting facts I found while digging around online:
- According toĀ this in-depth studyĀ of 4 million Americans, those who felt medium or high levels of purpose in their life exhibited better āsocial support, resilience, reliance on faith, health literacy, and better health.ā They were also physically and mentally healthier.
- This studyĀ found that people living āpurposefulā lives had higher incomes and net worths, and this applies to both young and older adults.
- And finally,Ā this studyĀ connected a sense of purpose with better stress management (and letās face it ā we could all use a bit of that)
So Iād say thereās more than enough incentive for us to find our purpose. And while it might seem like the whole topic of āfinding yourselfā and āliving your authentic purposeā is linked with contemporary, new-age thinkingā¦ weāve actually been on this train for a long time.
Viktor Franklās Logotherapy
āEverything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms ā to choose oneās attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose oneās own way.ā
This is a quote from Viktor Frankl, a prominent psychiatrist and neurologist who developed something calledĀ ālogotherapyāĀ during his time in Nazi concentration camps.
In case youāre not familiar, logotherapy was born out of Franklās observation that those who survived the concentration camps were the ones with a sense of purpose ā a reason to keep going despite their unimaginable circumstances.
Logotherapy essentially argues that humans need meaning and purpose to avoid despair. Itās such a powerful theory because Viktor combines his own intensely personal experiences with a huge body of research on the topic.
And itās worth noting that Viktor didnāt just survive the camps ā he thrived, going on to write best-selling books and help thousands of patients. He was an incredibly inspiring man, and his work has had a profound impact on how we think about meaning and purpose.
So there are a couple of prominent thoughts on what purpose is and why we might need it. But how do we chase it? (And later,Ā shouldĀ we chase it?)
Ikigai Takes the Western World By Storm
Anyone whoās vaguely familiar with Japanese culture and history will know that it overflows with wisdom. From Japanās philosophies, weāve been introduced to core acceptance (Uketamo), continuous and sustainable self-improvement (Kaizen), and of course ā Ikigai.
Iām sure weāve talked about this before. Ikigai is essentially your reason for living ā your passion, your mission, and what youāre meant to do in this lifetime. But it goes a little deeper than that.
Ikigai is a method of finding what youāre meant to do in this lifetime. It lays out a simple Venn diagram with four quadrants:
- What you love
- What the world needs
- What you can be paid for
- What youāre good at
The sweet spot ā your Ikigai ā is where all four of these things intersect. Itās what brings you fulfillment, makes you happy, and feels like itās not even work because you enjoy it so much.
Ikigai hasnāt been applied very well in the West; weāve reduced it to a black and white concept, as we love to do (for some reason). You donāt need all four tenets to intercept in everything you do. Your job might make money and fill a need in the world, while your family might be the thing you love, and caring for them is what youāre good at.
Ikigai is about balance and living a full life. Itās not about having one all-consuming passion that you do to the exclusion of everything else (although that can be part of it).
Purpose Through Spirituality
It would be silly not to mention spirituality here. We humans have been embracing the idea of spirituality in all its forms since the dawn of time. And yes ā for some people, it is their method of finding their purpose.
The word āspiritualityā gets thrown around a lot these days, and it can mean different things to different people. For some, spirituality is about connecting with the divine ā whatever that looks like for them. This could manifest as going to church every Sunday, or it might look like spending time in nature and communing with the Earth.
Others might define spirituality as:
- A sense of connection to something bigger than ourselves
- An awareness of the interconnectedness of all things
- A felt sense of wonder, mystery, and awe
StudiesĀ have connected spirituality with a higher subjective sense of well-being, which includes purpose. Within those studies there are lots of caveats, obviously; certain lines of spiritual thinking are going to be more harmful than others. But in general, people who identify as spiritual tend to be happier and more fulfilled.
There are lots of different ways to find your spirituality ā and it might not look like what you expect. Thereās no one right way to do it. I found Kute Blacksonās approach to be super down-to-earth, so if youāre not overly religious but want to explore your spiritual side, I recommend checking our podcastĀ out.
Broader Advice from Mainstream Sources
Alongside these more specific approaches to finding your purpose, thereās a common set of steps recommended for finding your purpose.Ā John Coleman, author of the HBR Guide To Crafting Your Purpose, suggests asking yourself a series of questions during big life transitions:
āWhat is the core purpose of my work and the ways in which it makes the world better, and how can I lean into that purpose or craft my day-to-day work to emphasize it?
Who are the key relationships in my life, both inside and outside of work, and how can I deepen and enrich them?
Who am I serving in my work and outside of it, and what more can I do at work, at home, and in my community to serve others?
How am I becoming better each day? How can I pursue meaningful craft in my personal or professional life?ā
Then thereās the highly acclaimed āfinding your WHYā strategy from Simon Sinek, whoās written extensively on the topic. Sinekās idea is that most people know WHAT they do, and some people know HOW they do it ā but very few people can articulate WHY they do what they do.
Sinek suggests looking back into your past to find themes that stand out to you. What were the moments when you felt most fulfilled? When were you at your best? He says you can use this self-discovery and reflection to find your reason for doing things ā and by extension, your purpose.
Soā¦ Should We Chase That Feeling?
In all of these theories, philosophies, and pieces of advice, thereās a common theme. Finding your purpose is a mission. Itās a chase. Itās a journey. You have to go out and actively seek it.
And this is where a lot of people get stuck. They wait for clarity, or they look for some big life-changing event that will magically reveal their purpose to them. But the truth is, finding your purpose is an ongoing process ā and it might not ever feel like youāve āarrived.ā
I feel like we build up this idea of āseekingā and āfindingā our purpose as this massive, all-encompassing task. But it doesnāt have to be that way. You donāt have to go on some huge journey and come back with a big realization.
This is where Kute Blacksonās theory I mentioned at the beginning comes into play.
Stop Chasing, Stop Seeking, Stop Searching
Kute Blackson believes that the reason we donāt find our purpose is because weāre too busy chasing it. Our ego takes over and uses the āchaseā as a means of feeling fulfilled; it gets stuck in the effort rather than congruently living our purpose.
Instead, Kute says move toward the things that make you feel right. Not euphoric or happy ā those are temporary emotions. But the things that make you feel right on a deeper level, in your gut. The things that give you an overwhelming sense of āyesā.
Now, I know; itās sounding an awful lot like everything else Iāve talked about so far. But thereās a key difference.
In Kuteās way of thinking, he suggests moving toward your purpose as the opportunity arises. For instance ā maybe youāre given a new position at work in which you need to interact with people more. Suddenly you think, āthis feels incredible. I could really make a difference here.ā
So you lean into the role. You hint to your boss that this is something youāre passionate about. You start seeking out more opportunities to connect with people and make a difference in their lives.
Itās not about some huge āahaā moment or some grandiose realization that you need to change your life. Itās about being open and receptive to the opportunities that come your way, and then choosing whether or not to lean into them.
In other words ā thereās no chase, only acute awareness of the opportunities crossing your path.
Wrap-Up
Weāve covered a lot here. I want to clarify ā while I personally love Kuteās more āas it happensā approach to living your purpose, thereās definitely merit to all of the other theories and ideas weāve discussed. Some people actually find their purpose in the continual chase.
The key is to find what works for you.
I hope this has given you some clarity and a new perspective on finding your purpose. And if youāre still feeling stuck, remember ā you donāt need to make it a big scary mission. Just keep your eye out for the things that make you feel right, and trust your gut when it comes to taking action.
Also published here. ļ»æ